|
Um, you've got something in your eye. Oh, nevermind -- it's just
a sparkle.
SHOE SALE!
Your eyes are bluer than the water in my toilet.
If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard!
| You look like the Fourth of July. That
makes me want a hot dog real bad. | I
think, er, heaven hurt you and -- no, wait. Um, do you believe in walking by love at first sight? No that's not it, uh, I
have Windex in my...no. Oh, what the hell -- YOU'RE PRETTY!
Your pocket protector is makin' me hot.
May I be the next jealous boyfriend to slash your tires?
If you go out with me, I'll stop stalking you. I swear. Scout's honor.
| You're still ugly.
Buy me another beer. |
| Can you help me find my lost puppy? I
think he ran into that cheap hotel room! | Today's Give To The Poor Day, so will you give me your number?
| If your name isn't Chris, Eric, or Mike,
you might have a chance with me! |
| What would you REALLY do for a Klondike
Bar? |
| Are you free tonight, or am I gonna have
to pay? |
| Hey! I'm redecorating my room, and I think
you'd look wonderful in my bed. |
| Well, you're not hideous.
|
| So, what should we name our kids? |
| You're hotter than my pits after gym class.
|
| I lost my Chapstick -- can you moisturize
my lips? |
| I must ask you to remove your pants as
a matter of national security. |
| I got food stamps -- wanna get married?
|
| Can you help me find Nemo? I think he
fell down my pants. |
| My psychic said I'd meet the love of my
life tonight, but you'll do fine for now. |
| Oooh! OOOH! Pick me!
PICK ME! |
(For musicians.) I'm a fermata -- hold me!
| You're on my list of things to do tonight.
|
| Do I know you, or
is that just wishful thinking? |
| Is your favorite Little Rascal Alfalfa
or Spanky? 'Cause I can be both. |
| You're so fine you make Halle Berry look
like Barry White. |
| I got a problem: If one train's coming
from the east at 90 mph, and another one's coming from the south at 84 mph, how long will it take for me to get you to go
out with me? |
| Hey, how 'bout you blow in my ear while
we watch Slumber Party Massacre II and eat Bueno Bars? |
| Your name must be Skippy, 'cause you got
a nice spread! |
| Hey, girl! It's shower time! |
I love you almost as much as I love my goat.
| Every minute you don't give me your phone
number, God kills a kitten. Please -- think of the kitties. |
| I would ask you out,
but pushing you down and laughing would be funnier. |
| Four out of five dentists recommend that
we sleep with each other. |
| You must be this tall
to give me your phone number. |
| You look like my fourth boyfriend. And
I've only had three. |
| Hey! You just touched me -- now you gotta
take me home! |
| Girl, you look better than a new set of
snow tires! |
| If you were a tree, I'd, uh, like, really
be into trees! |
| Did you just slap
my ass? No? Damn! |
| My phone number's too long -- can I have
yours? |
| Let's make like candles
and go out. |
| You're pretty when I'm drunk. |
| Hi, I just thought I'd give you the satisfaction
of turning me down. Okay, now say no! |
| If you were booze, I'd want to die of
liver failure. |
| For the love of God, please? |
| I'm writing a phone book. Can I have your
number? |
| I can't find my shoes. Wanna make out?
|
| Let's grab some barbecue and get busy.
|
| Baby, you're sexier than socks on a rooster!
|
| I'll be your cholesterol, just to find
a way into your heart. |
| If you ever look this good again, I'm
gonna be forced to make love to you. |
| Your eyes are like...uh...two...big
eyes. | So, you like guns?
| If I ever get a life,
will you share it with me? |
| What part of my destiny did you say you
were from again? |
| If we were fractions,
I'm sure we'd be improper. |
| You're so fine, I forgot my pickup line.
|
| I'm lost -- can I
follow you home? |
| Don't look! I'm staring at you. |
Nice...Bible.
| Girl, I got more game than a PlayStation!
|
| It's mind over matter, baby -- I don't
mind, and your husband don't matter. |
| With my looks and your credit card, we
could go places. |
| Damn! Who whacked
you with the sexy stick? |
| I'm researching the
finer things in life. Mind if I interview you? |
| My imaginary friend
thinks you're beautiful. |
| You don't want to lose this napkin --
it's got my number on it. |
| Are you available this Christmas? I need
an angel for the top of my tree. |
| If you were a wedgie, I'd pick you. |
| So, how many licks does it take
to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? |
| Your eyes are like a vacuum -- they just
keep sucking me in! |
| Okay, here I am. So what were your other
two wishes? |
| Did you know that Apple Jacks shrink in
milk? It's true! |
| If a fat man in red
comes in the middle of the night and stuffs you into a sack, don't be scared -- it's only Santa. I told him I wanted you for
Christmas. |
| I want to buy you a cheeseburger. |
| I love the way your
nostrils flare. |
| My mom says I'm handsome -- what do you
think? |
| Did you know Neptune's
atmosphere is 74% hydrogen? |
| I have a job, money, a house, a car, and
a dog. Will you be moving in today or tomorrow? |
| Haven't I hit on you
before? |
| Can I tell you a secret? Underneath my
coat, my jacket, my sweater, my sweatshirt, my thermal undershirt, my t-shirt, and my bra -- I'm not wearing anything.
|
| Hi! I'm Mr. Right! I was told you were
looking for me? |
| My boyfriend said
it's okay if I date other people while he's in prison. |
| No wonder it's so grey outside -- all
the pretty blues are in your eyes. |
| Do you have all of your teeth? |
| You probably can't tell by looking at
me, but I can run really fast! |
| You make my liver quiver. |
| Your spinal cord intrigues me. |
| Hey! I suffer from amnesia! Do I come
here often? |
| Stand still so I can
pick you up! |
| Oh, I'm sorry -- you looked really cute
from far away. |
| Are you stalking me? 'Cause that would
be super. |
| Let me check out your tag -- yep, just
what I thought. "Made in Heaven." |
|
